What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
