just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Pooping to opera.
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