the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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