the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Randomize
