They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
