Everything about him screamed your future.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
