let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
