Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
do herpes really smell.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
