She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
