Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize