I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
