clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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