Buhtt sex?
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Randomize
