She's JV to your varsity
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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