I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
