whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
