my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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