We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
