left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
