either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
