im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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