Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
