I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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