If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
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