its not stalking. its research.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize
