me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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