me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
