So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Randomize
