I'm sorry my penis didn't work
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
