Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
