Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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