So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Randomize
