I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Randomize
