I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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