i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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