I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
