She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
