i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Randomize
