doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
