yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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