yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
