In the future we'll all be gay
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
