He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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