it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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