It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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