She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
