I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
