My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
