I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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