Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Randomize
